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Count Meatula's Spooktober Movie Madness: 2020: The Year of Doom

Greetings boys and ghouls, it’s your dear old pal, Dr. Meatula. I know 2020 has most of you feeling a little down but I try to look on the sunny side of things. With all of the pandemics, white nationalism, elections featuring stupid fascists, and fires big enough to see from space this is working out to be the scariest Halloween since 1346!

Like usual I have dedicated my time to watching a minimum of 31 horror movies over the 31 days of October. Some classics I’ve spent more time with than my kids, some recommendations from the voices in my head, and a few randoms things that I jump right into because I like the box art. That’s how you make good life decisions, right?

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Well, without further ado, I give you the first selection of my week of thrills, spills, chills, and kills!

Movie 1: Club Dread: Hadn’t seen it before and it kind of surprised me. Some of the comedy is pretty decent (not as good as Troopers) and Paxton is fantastic as a washed up Jimmy Buffet expy but it actually works as a damn good slasher flick. I could easily imagine this one coming out in the early to mid 80's and becoming a cult classic later on in life. Broken Lizard should make more more slasher movies.

Movie 2: The Video Dead: A brother and sister must survive zombies coming out of a cursed television. One of the zombies likes to strangle people for some reason. Definitely a weird one. I’m being told cocaine was popular in the 80's but that is totally unrelated to this movie. Cocaine!

Movie 3: Antrum: This one was a very pleasant surprise. I pulled it up while randomly surfing Prime and really enjoyed the atmosphere combined with some haunting and disturbing imagery. Not gory or violent. Just bleak and dark, like a grim fairy tale. Two kids go out to the woods to dig a hole to hell to free their dead dog’s soul. I guess all dogs DON’T go to heaven!

Movie 4: The Exorcist 3: Definitely a really underrated horror movie. Great performances all around, especially from Brad Dourif and George C. Scott. Add in some genuinely creepy and suspenseful scenes and you got a stew, baby. George C. Scott got a Razzie for this one? Fuck you Razzies and eat my butt.

Movie 5: The Falling: This was kind of a fun one. Films in ‘84 but no released until ‘87 apparently (and it shows), it’s 1 part Alien, mixed with 1 part The Crazies, and a dash of The Andromeda Strain. Throw in three wacky teens and a dune buggy and you have sweet ass dune buggy chase in the final act. Good bad movie night fodder.

Movie 6: Fright Night: I hadn’t seen this one in a good long while and while Lost Boys will always be the better 1980's teen dealing with vampires movie, this one still holds up damn well. Nice effects, a good sleazy vibe at times, and probably my favorite role Roddy McDowall ever had. I did completely forget about all the homoeroticism in the movie. I’ll always wonder if that was intentional or just a happy little accident.

Movie 7: Friday the 13th Part 6: Jason Lives: Much like Jason himself, the Friday the 13th movies are just dumb blunt instruments. There’s nothing clever about them and there’s really not much of a point to them and I love them because of that. 6 is probably the height of the original series. You have some good effects work and kills, the introduction of zombie Jason, a slightly more meta and fun atmosphere while still keeping a few genuinely good scares, and arguably the best soundtrack in the franchise. Two big bony thumbs up.

Movie 8: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2: Easily my favorite in the series. Don’t get me wrong, the original is probably a better movie but 2 is just so much damn fun. It has probably my favorite performance by Dennis Hopper, and the entire thing moves along at a damn fast pace. I’ll also never get tired of Jim Siedow as Drayton Sawyer in it. He perfectly plays a psychopathic killer who is a businessman first and foremost. Yeah, he’ll kill ya but his biggest concerns are bills and new competition in the food truck industry. He also knows you can’t trust vegetarians.

See you next Friday. Same Meatula time. Same Meatual channel.

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